Plans and Goals for 2014

There are going to be some changes in 2014. Some I’ll like. Some I’ll hate. Some I’ll grow tired of and likely forget after a week or two. That’s why I’m posting this nonsense here and now. In the event I do forget to continue these changes, I want you to basically publically shame me back into doing so in a manner of speaking… Like, helpful reminds and not actually shaming me with horrid insults and threats… unless I know you very well and I can tell you’re just joking… that said, let’s roll out.

Humanity's Flaws: A Look at Marvel's Henry Pym

 Time for another parting look. I was struggling to think of who are next segment would be about. It’s tough to follow a God comparison of GlaDOS BUT we have to. Not only that, we’re following on the heels of three successful posts about strong female characters in film and games. This got me thinking of who I could follow all that up with and it hit me. While I might know enough to do him justice, only one character can follow up all that and still be someone related… today… we’re talking about Hank Pym (aka Ant-Man aka Goliath aka The Wasp aka Giant Man aka Yellow Jacket aka fuckwad).

My Look Back at 2013

 I said (on Friday) that my post for Sunday would be a surprise. This was partly because I wasn’t sure what to write at the time (thus, a surprise to myself as well). But I decided to do a top ten list (last one for the year) on the top lessons learned and events of 2013. This is more of a personal nature, but given that this started as a personal blog for me to discuss problems with people (which never came to fruition) I felt it was the best way to close the year. It was either that or put together a massive orgy… but that would require more cleaning up than I’d like.

Top Ten FILMS of 2013

This year’s top ten may be sad at this rate. I’ve seen quite a number of films this year, but there’s a good number I missed out on and I feel they’d be worth a look and deserver a spot on this list without question. If it doesn’t make it on the list but probably deserves to be like I assume Gravity, 12 Years a Slave, and The Hobbit Desolation of Smog might, then just assume I never got around to seeing it for some raisin. Without further ado, here’s my top ten movies of 2013 (note to self: which may change before the year is actually over)

#10 – Pokémon the Movie: Genesect & the Legend Awakened
 - I’m doing my top ten films of the year and I know that, if anything, I’ll get some shit for this one. It wasn’t even the best Pokémon movie and I’m putting it on this list while leaving off notable works like Man of Steel and Fast & Furious Again. My response… yes, I did. Man of Steel is a movie with interesting visuals and fight sequences, but a Superman movie it is not. It’s also, in a narrative sense, boring. Zod’s whole plan and reason for doing things is generic and lifted straight from better works of fiction while the whole following daddy’s orders/teachings from two dads being a conflict for Superman got really old, especially when one didn’t feel like he really died and the other died for really no bloody reason at all.
 - So, yes, I didn’t like Man of Steel and I’m retroactively giving this to a Pokémon movie to not only piss off fans, but to make a point that Pokémon is something I find fun while Man of Steel is something I don’t. Also, Mewtwo. Nothing beats Mewtwo.

#09 – Oz The Great & Powerful
 - A sign that proves I was totally right about Spiderman 3 not entirely being the fault of Sam Raimi is that I can point to a film like Oz The Great & Powerful and show that he actually possess talent of an actual filmmaker and the first two movies weren’t just flukes. The CGI, the plot, the characters, and the world building were all right in line with Raimi’s usual skillset and it was all pretty well-done. Having the ladies not being the central focus, while also being the central driving force of the plot was a fun take on the origins of Oz. Though I will still point out how creating a magical world back in the day didn’t require this much CGI, but just some actual sets and props. But in 2013, I’ll be surprise if anything isn’t green screened at all.

#08 – Iron Man 3
 - When this first launched, I expected this to be film of the year for me. It was a movie I had an immense amount of fun with during subsequent viewings. The acting was great, the writing was hilarious, the action was minimal, but goofy and good for laughs. And the plot twist with the Mandarin was… mixed, but I liked it because it gave us (including fans of the comics) something we didn’t expect. And when a film can surprise us despite everything (plot wise) already being laid out for us, it’s a nice change from the norm. Plus, Robert Downey Jr., one of few Hollywood men I could probably go gay for if I wasn’t otherwise involved and desperately wanted some love and attention for all of about five minutes. Despite all that, I couldn’t keep Iron Man 3 on the throne of MOTY like I wanted. So many good films followed it up that it got pushed down to 8^th place. That should tell you we actually had a pretty good year.

#07 – Monsters University
 - Pixar hasn’t been hitting it out of the park for me like it used to. Brave, while good, wasn’t on the same level as some of my classic favorites like Toy Story or The Incredibles. Not that it was bad. Hell, even a BAD Pixar movie is still better than the average movie. But between the less than stellar Brave and the now tiresome (no pun intended) Cars franchise, I’m wondering when we’ll see a new Pixar movie that can rival great works like Up. Well, we didn’t find out this year, but we did get Monsters University, a prequel to Monsters Inc, which is rendered less than effective by the fact that the ending of Monsters In. makes much of what is necessary in Monsters University largely unnecessary. By that, I mean that we already know scaring is outdated and obsolete in the end, yet here we have to pretend and remember that there was a time when scaring was the only thing available for energy for the Monsters world. Again, that doesn’t make this film bad, but it could have been more or even not needed, in exchange for a much better film. I’m still waiting for an Incredibles sequel Pixar. It’s been ten years. We’re ready for another outing with the animated heroes you gave us so long ago.

#06 – The Conjuring
 - I’ve taken it upon myself to diversify my top ten by including as many genre’s as possible. And this year was especially helpful with that. I was initially worried it’d be over saturated with super hero films. Not that such a thing is bad, but I want to have more than just one kind of movie on this list. Which is why I’m really glad we actually had one good horror film with The Conjuring. A genuinely scary film that was actually embracing the goofier aspects of horror with straight-faced seriousness. Creepy bits are creepy. And while jump scares are plentiful, they are built up to in a way that makes them all work. It’s a more modern take on the exorcist story that works and if you like horror, this is a film worth watching and not some god awful remake of a classic like Carrie.

#05 – Prisoners
 - It’s hard to really define Prisoners. It has elements of mystery because of missing people and needing to find out who did it and why. It has elements of horror because I can’t think of anything more terrifying than having your kids be taken away by strangers who might very well kill them. It has elements of action because of some brutal torture scenes that also come off as borderline horror. But it is generically defined as a “drama” and I feel that doesn’t do it justice. Either way, you won’t walk away feeling good and you’ll likely agree that now, if ever, Hugh Jackman deserves some fucking recognition for his considerably good acting. I walked away somewhat depressed from this film because a lot of it really does take from real life with the only exception being that happy endings are a rarity in life and that if this had been real, those kids would likely never have been found. Now I’m going to go cry a little and think of something positive… like…

#04 – Thor: The Dark Worlds
 - Marvel had two great showings this year, which wasn’t that surprising. But what did surprise me is just how much better Thor 2 was compared to both its predecessor AND to the Marvel films in general. Aside from Avengers, I felt like Thor 2 really stepped up its game enough to hold its place as one of my favorite super hero films of all time, which says a lot since it’s up there with Spiderman 2, Dark Knight, Avengers, and even Incredibles. Granted, the strength of this movie lies with Tom Hiddleston’s Loki, who is the most fun and most incredible in this film, by far. The A-plot feels like it takes a back seat to him at times, but that was somewhat expected given his popularity sky rocketed in Avengers. It makes me excited for next year’s outings in both Captain America and Guardians of the Galaxy. But I have doubts that nothing can compete with this film in terms of just being fun and entertaining when it comes to super heroes, at least not yet.

#03 – Pacific Rim
 - Argue with me if you want that it’s just “Cliché: The Movie”. Argue with me if you want that this is just a dumb movie with giant robots and monsters made to appeal to children. Argue with me if you want that it just isn’t good. Those arguments fall on deaf ears because I had fun with this film more than most other movies of 2014. How often do we get movies with giant robots or kaiju anymore? How often do we get big spectacles with absurd stories? Yes, it’s dumb, but I was on the front lines showcasing that, while dumb, that Saints Row 2 was one of the best games ever made simply because it’s fun. And Pacific Rim is right in line with that. Could it have been more? Sure, but so could a lot of films. I would love to see more of this, even if it is all just nonsensical robot and monster fights with another barely noticed story. Why? Because that’s fun. Certainly more fun than watching Superman mope in his underwear after destroying Metropolis, a city in which he was supposed to be protecting.

#02 – Frozen
 - Of 2013, there have only been two films where I legitimately wanted to stand up and applaud it for giving more effort to not only be entertaining and tell a good story, but to throw away traditional aspects of story structure and common trends of writing now in favor of doing something unique and bold. One of those two films is Frozen, an animated Disney musical about two sisters who must overcome their individual problems to help save the kingdom from a problem they both unintentionally started. Going into detail on how this film breaks tradition of Disney storytelling would be spoiling the third act in its entirety, but it takes cues from other, more modern, animated works and does something that you never would have expected Disney to go with. And, hey, you know what? The holidays are here and you might have kids in your family (yours or ones you’re related to) that would likely enjoy this film. Go see it because it is probably one of the best Disney movies of all time, and certainly one of the best films in 2013. There’s no reason NOT to see it. If you need further proof, just look up “Let it Go” on youtube and be amazed by what is one of the best musical numbers in Disney canon to date. Or watch the video embedded above this paragraph because it’s fucking good!

#01 – Elysium
 - The other film that decided to buck trends in your usual Hollywood writing was Elysium. So many times, I feel movies are dumbed down and spending time to explain everything in a story so it all makes sense to as many people as possible. The best example being X-Men Origins: Wolverine which spoiled all the mysteries of Wolverine’s character, making him infinitely less interesting. But there’s also just your average sci-fi or fantasy film that has to take time to explain how in world stuff works and why things are the way they are. Elysium is a sci fi movie that doesn’t bother to sit down and explain things, because it has a story it wants to deliver and it jumps out the gate making sure that’s all that matters. Everything is very much “Show, Don’t Tell” which is supposed to be the golden rule of writing 101, and it’s very pleasing to see a movie keep to that. Taking this fact alone was enough to cement Elysium on the top ten…
 - But beyond that, it’s just a good sci fi film. So many interesting things I want to explore more of. So many great characters with actors giving some of the best performances I’ve seen of any of them. A special shout out to Matt Damon for actually being in a movie where I don’t get bored of him playing a one-dimensional character. The action scenes are really good and everything just looks fantastic. Another Neil Blomkamp spectacular that is worth of all the praise it can get and well worth your time to see it. I wondered if this could have been unseated by anything else this year and Frozen was REALLY close to doing so.

Wasn't that lovely? Our top ten films of the year highlighting ONLY the BEST works of narrative in film that could possibly exist. Truly, no other such films that were released this year could have earned a place on this list except for maybe The Hobbit 2: Another One. But, alas, at the time of writing and posting, I have yet to see it and would hate to give it a spot over something like Pokemon or Monsters Inc if it hadn't truly earned it... though it still beats fucking Man of Steel without me needing to have seen it to know that. Have a great weekend and enjoy the holidays! 

Top Ten Games of 2013

Guess what folks! It’s time for that end of the year “Best Games OF 2013” list. I held this list off as long as I could to make sure I could fit in all the best games I could in here. Getting as close to the end as we could, we might still be missing a few titles, but that’s largely due to a lack of money, a lack of technology (I don’t own all the consoles after all), or due to a lack of free time. That said, here are my top ten games of 2013. Take it away, myself.

Putting the Yule Back in Yuletide

I’ve been debating about this for a while and there’s lots of reasons for and against posting this. Why do it? Because this initially started off as a journal to express personal thoughts, opinions, and feelings about life events or just life in general and it has sort of deviated from that, but in a good way (I think). But I’d like to get to personal topics more often, especially when they may or may not be relevant. So if this does get posted, it’ll be Christmas because of the topic I’m going to cover…

God in the Machine: Parting Thoughts on Portal

Wow, these “Parting Thought” bits actually got views… and at least one got a response, and an insightful one at that. Perhaps I should do more of these in the hopes of elevating myself into some kind of internet wise man who explains all unclear parts of games and movies that none understand or that are left up to MASSIVE amounts of interpretation. We’ve already put Elsa and Clementine under the looking glass and I feel a trend going here. I want to spend an issue talking about how GlaDOS from Portal is God.

Saving the Digital World

I have found myself in a bit of a lull for the past few days. Nothing has come up for me to write an angry post about and all my “Best of” posts are for the upcoming week along with some religious-themed stuff (a topic I rarely touch for reasons you’re likely to find out here in the coming week). Thus I have nothing in particular I want to write. I have ideas for a few topics, but nothing I want to do because I want to do more “research” on the subject.

The Best I Can: Parting Thoughts Walking Dead Season One

 “You’re either livin’ or you’re not. You ain’t little. You ain’t a girl. You ain’t a boy. You ain’t strong. You ain’t smart. You’re alive.” The new game is almost out… so let’s talk about the last one because we can…

Let It Go: Parting Thoughts on Elsa

Frozen was a very unique film in a lot of ways and it’s something I’m interested in discussing farther because there really are a lot of layers to it. Warning, spoilers ahead.

To Friends, Family, and You

I’ve learned a few things recently in relation to this blog posting I do. First, I actually do have readers. This has become evident because of the reaction to the personal post I did a few days ago AND from actual discussion with actual people about it. And that’s really good. My goal isn’t to strive for attention, but to at least put opinions out there in a hopefully constructive manner and instigate some discussion on the matter.

Movie Reviews: Frozen

Frozen is a Disney film that came out roughly a week ago (and a few days). I only just got to seeing it recently because of scheduling reasons. And it’s a shame because it was really good and I wish I could have been there from the beginning with everyone else saying how it is really good. So good that you should just drop whatever you’re doing and go see it as soon as possible.

Another Generation of Greed and Stupidity

Before we get to any reviews of any movies that are any good, let’s talk about some stupid corporate bullshit in the video game industry. Why? Because I’ve got two bits of news that just straight piss me off for one reason or another. No more filler, we’re diving right on into this mess.

Why?

For the duration of this article, I’ll be using the word “man” because most of this is referring to one man in particular. Or, more accurately, a boy. Because he never really grew out of that mental state of being a self-absorbed teenage twat. But the generic, soul-seeking questions I ask could either be male or female. I’m clarifying this now to not look sexist and to open with something moderately comical. On with post.

Walking Dead Mid-Season 4 Kerfuffle

So as you all know based on several posts, I love me some Walking Dead. The best version is the TellTale game because it knows how to make good characters (as in characters that feel real, not just characters of good people).

Xbone? PS4? Trigger, Please!

I’m sure I’ve done a review for the game somewhere before. But this came up in discussion not long ago. In short, a few chums of mine and I were debating on the best console since some new ones just launched the other day. And after some careful thinking, I had an answer. The Xbone and the PS4 are both severely inferior to SEVERAL devices for one simple flaw.